How to Collaborate When It’s Not Easy (But Necessary)
Insights from 3 experts on building trust, navigating conflict, and creating real team alignment.
When Collaboration Isn’t in Tune
I’ve had the privilege of leading a parallel career as a professional musician. As a founding member of the Irish/Scottish trad band, Shantalla, we recorded four highly acclaimed albums and performed together for over 25 years - all five original members.
https://www.shantallamusic.com
Sounds like the perfect collaboration story, right?
Well… yes - and no.
Like any creative endeavour, there was plenty of conflict. Disagreements about arrangements, artistic choices, touring logistics - you name it. At times, the tension was very real.
Back then, I didn’t have the frameworks I now use in my work with teams.
In this edition of The Leading Edge, I’m sharing insights from three extraordinary Leading People podcast guests - each of whom has contributed to shaping my own understanding of what it really takes to collaborate well, especially when tensions run high.
3 Expert Ideas to Help You Collaborate More Effectively
The Hidden Cost of Conflict Avoidance
Jim Tamm is a former judge and co-creator of Radical Collaboration and the accompanying book of the same name. His TEDx talk has garnered over 5 million views. I first met Jim in 2015 and subsequently became a certified trainer of Radical Collaboration.
Insight:
Most teams aren’t openly fighting. They’re locked in subtle, unspoken power dynamics - what Jim calls the “pink zone.” It looks harmonious, but it’s built on fear and avoidance.
Test this out:
Watch for signs of defensiveness - raised voices, faster speech, sarcastic humour, trivialising, etc. These are early warning signals that trust is slipping and psychological safety is low.
Your own defensiveness is the first place to intervene.
Watch Jim’s TEDx talk to learn how to develop your own defensiveness early warning system. It’ll make you think about conflict in a completely different way. https://youtu.be/vjSTNv4gyMM?si=SjXicdUZUq80bD0a
“Pink zone workforces are created by red zone managers.”
🎧 Listen to Jim’s Leading People episode
Why Conversations Matter
Craig Weber is the author of Conversational Capacity and Influence in Action. I was introduced to Craig and his work by Wide Circle’s Senior Advisor and mutual good friend, Rick Tate.
Insight:
The quality of collaboration rises and falls with your ability to balance candour and curiosity — especially when stakes are high. You might be surprised to learn that teams that seem to get along find it difficult to have the tough conversations that are often needed to dispel the proverbial “elephants in the room”!
Test this out:
In meetings, practice saying what needs to be said (candour) while staying open to other views (curiosity). This balance is a skill that can be learned — and it’s what keeps tough conversations from turning toxic.
“Conversational capacity isn’t just a communication skill - it’s a team discipline.”
🎧 Listen to Craig’s Leading People episode
Why Conversations Matter
Craig Weber is the author of Conversational Capacity and Influence in Action. I was introduced to Craig and his work by Wide Circle’s Senior Advisor and mutual good friend, Rick Tate.
Insight:
The quality of collaboration rises and falls with your ability to balance candour and curiosity — especially when stakes are high. You might be surprised to learn that teams that seem to get along find it difficult to have the tough conversations that are often needed to dispel the proverbial “elephants in the room”!
Test this out:
In meetings, practice saying what needs to be said (candour) while staying open to other views (curiosity). This balance is a skill that can be learned — and it’s what keeps tough conversations from turning toxic.
“Conversational capacity isn’t just a communication skill - it’s a team discipline.”
🎧 Listen to Craig’s Leading People episode
Collaboration in the Hybrid Era
Larry English is the CEO of award-winning Centric Consulting and author of Office Optional. Like me, Larry has been running a remote organisation for over 20 years. He started writing Office Optional before the COVID pandemic. Its publication, as we came out of lockdown, was timely.
Insight:
Remote and hybrid teams can’t just rely on proximity to create cohesion. Collaboration must be designed intentionally. Larry advocates regularly bringing remote teams together in a physical location. The benefits are immense.
Test this out:
Don’t confuse connectivity with collaboration. Build explicit norms for communication, decision-making, and problem-solving across time zones and platforms. Model these as a leader. Bring your remote and hybrid teams together at least once a year.
“You need to codify what collaboration looks like in your culture - especially when you’re not all in the same place.”
🎧 Listen to Larry’s Leading People episode
Quick Wins with Your Team This Week
If you’re facing tension, misalignment, or radio silence in your team, don’t wait for it to sort itself out.
- Observe your own defensiveness and develop your early warning system.
- When facing disagreement, ask a curious question when you’d normally push your own view.
- Clarify how your team collaborates - what’s expected, encouraged, and avoided – and bring them together regularly at a physical location.
Small shifts can lead to big breakthroughs.
Are your Teams ready to Collaborate?
At Wide Circle, we work with teams to help them reduce conflict, negotiate effectively and improve collaboration. Check out our Collaboration Services
https://www.widecircle.eu/better-collaboration
🎧 Explore the Leading People podcast for more tips on leadership and collaboration:
https://leadingpeople.buzzsprout.com
Let’s Start a Conversation
Which of these tips do you find most useful?
Let me know in the comments - or share your own go-to conflict-resolution or collaboration tool.
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Share this edition with someone who’s experiencing a conflict or finding it difficult to collaborate.
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